Zoe has unwittingly fallen into the trap of becoming something that she never wanted, nor intended to be – a conversational conduit. What the heck is that you ask? Well its really quite simple. Kris and I have begun to use Zoe as a “go between” to make comments, usually ones of a sarcastic or cutdownish tone, to each other. Although these comments are always spoken to Zoe ( and usually in baby talk tone), they are most certainly directed at each other.

One of our favorite time to use our little conduit is when travelling in the car. Whenever both of us are in the car together, one of us rides in the back seat with The Littlest General. This gives us easy access to follow her every order, but also to observe the other parent’s driving habits. One of our most commonly used conduit cut-down is “Momma (or Daddy) is driving CRAZY, huh?” Oh yeah, often times the conversational use of the conduit involies a question directed at Zoe, knowing full well that she will not answer. Everyone knows that silence implies consent.

Driving is not the only time we use our little conduit. We often times use her as a commentary on each others parenting skills, or more directly, thier lack there of. When Zoe cries for example, its so easy to throw down the old “Momma’s neglecting you, huh?” or “I guess your not as important to Daddy as his computer”.

As you can see, the cutdowns, sarcastic tones, and brutal commentaries flow freely and quickly like electrons through our little conduit.

Categories: Rantings
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