What is he talking about? I’ll tell you. This is about a wonderful place called Costco. Not because of the great bargains they have available to members. It’s about the fringe benefits that we often times enjoy. The benefits of which I refer are the ones that have to do with Zoe. Cheap Diapers in bulk, yes, but again – not what I’m talking about.

Get to the point! OK, alright already…

The benefits I’m speaking of are the ones that involve Zoe needing to get out of the house and run around. Yes, we are Gymboree members, but that place has you on a schedule. Yes, we could take her to Way 2 Play Cafe, but thats an eight mile drive and eight bucks! Why not Costco? We only live about 2 miles from it and our memberships are paid up!

Costco is great because we can set Zoe loose in there. Sure you could do this in a grocery store or the mall, but then you hafta deal with her knocking stuff over. Not at Coscto. We’ve found that everything in there, being in bulk, is just to big for her to knock over or pull of the shelf. It’s a cheap parents dream. And it wears her down cause the place is so darn big! Zoe especially likes a massage chair that they have sitting in aisle 3. It doesn’t work but she loves trying to work the buttons.

When Zoe gets cranky from being cooped up, we take her to Costco to burn some little calories and run herself tired. And if necessary we can always buy 10 gallons of mayonnaise while we are there.Its a dream come true! Beware all of you who might try this with your toddlers, because it leads to a chronic desire for your little one to be let out of the shopping cart anywhere they go.

Categories: Rantings
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I had to undergo a horrible 9 minute drill yesterday. Here’s how it went down.

Zoe took her nap at about 11:00 AM like she always does, after a fun time at Gymboree. At 11:30 she was up. An hour and a half early. Not good. She has minor cold symptoms from receiving her 18 month shots (3 days after she turned 19 months). Side note – Every time she gets her shots they make her sick! It gets quite annoying over time. Back to the drill. At about 4:30 PM, she was rubbing her eyes, showing signs of fatigue. She had been pretty cranky all afternoon and needed to take another nap, even if it was just for 20 minutes or so, she needed it.

The drill started at 4:34 PM, after we had unsuccessfully laid her down in bed with us for a nap. Momma decided that she needed to go in her crib to cry for 10 minutes, wearing her out. At 4:35, a minute after Zoe was in the crib, I looked at my watch. Zoe was screaming bloody murder.

I looked at my watch, 4:35 and 30 seconds! Isn’t this over yet? At 4:44 it would be over. I wasn’t sure who was having a rougher time, me or Zoe? I was writhing, trying to focus on something besides, ahhhh, shes screaming. Is she OK? Is she hurt? Did she fall? Oh my God, my baby! Every horrible scenario I could think of for why shewas crying raced through my head. Then she stopped. Oh God! Did she choke? Did she swallow her tongue? I pondered tis impossibility for what seemed to be 10 minutes as she began crying again. Watch check- 4:37. Are you kidding me? WTF? My poor poor Zoe. Helpless, alone, frightened. The seconds passed like hours. Kris then came back into the room, nonchalantly, as if to say “This is no big deal” Damn right it was. I SCREAMED (In my head) How can she do this? I looked down at my watch, 3 minutes to go. Kris asked “2 more minutes?” Of course I responded “yup” and toughed out the rest, gritting my teeth and counting the seconds.

Kris announced, “It’s time” and I told her that I agreed. She headed into the bedroom and told me to lay still and not open my eyes when she brought Zoe back. She wanted me to feign sleeping to get her to sleep. I did as instructed and stayed as still and quiet as I could be. I felt like a little boy playing hide and seek. They came in and Zoe was quietly fussed. I kept still and she eventually stopped.

We both drifted of into peaceful slumber, until 5:30. All that for another half an hour.

Categories: Rantings
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Zoe is now 19 months old. Some things she loves are as follows:

• Drinking HUGE amounts of orange juice (not fond of milk)- seriously, a gallon a week.
• Watching the opening scenes of “Raiders of the Lost Ark” and “Ace Ventura.”
• Putting on her own clothes.
• Telling us “Eeewwww!” after she poops her diaper.
• Kissing the dogs, me and Momma, and her stuffed toys and literally everyone and everything (except Uncle Fred and Uncle Matt, sorry guys).
• Telling us (signs, mostly) to sit down and play with her.
• Going to bed with NO fuss, often times she initiates bed time.

This is just a re-cap. She is doing great otherwise. Thanks for caring and reading if you do!

Categories: Milestones
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I’m gonna brag, once again about my Zoe. This one has me stumped to no end. Momma keeps telling me that Zoe is smart, yadda yadda yadda. Every parent thinks their child is smart (at least at first), right?

Well, try this one on for size…

Momma, Zoe and I were sitting in the living room yesterday, playing. Zoe has a little Disney book set that teaches shapes and colors. This is a little box with 5 books inside of it, each teaching shapes with a different female Disney character. Ariel, from the Little Mermaid, Belle, from Beauty and the Beast, etc, etc. This book-box comes with a CD tucked in a side sleeve on it. Momma looked at the CD and said, “Hmm, let’s listen to the CD!” She then proceeded to remove the CD from the sleeve and hold it out in her hand while saying “Zoe, put the CD where it goes.” Zoe walked over to her, grabbed the CD and walked over the the Media Center computer under the TV (desktop PC on a shelf just below the television), pushed the button on the DVD player that ejects the tray, placed the CD in the tray and closed it. To coin a phrase from my mother (God rest her soul), I didnt know whether to sh*t or wind my watch. I was absolutely dumbfounded as Kris and I burst out into laughter.

I later had to spank Zoe for getting her fingerprints on the CD.

She’ll just hafta learn.

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Zoe hit the great 18 month milestone while we were in Carlsbad, CA for our annual vacation. Wow. It is really a kick in the butt. She has started talking quite a bit. Using more words everyday, and learning new ones is the cool part. We are splitting the penthouse suite of an ocean front beach house with Momma’s mom and grandma. Ya-Ya and Little Ya-Ya, respectively. We all sat around the table with her the other night. telling her “Say Momma” and she’d reply “Ma-Ma”. Say “Daddy” and she’d pop out “Da-Da” in her usual tone of voice. But then we’d ask her to say Ya-Ya and shed say it back to us, pitching her voice about 3 octives higher in a soothing sweet tone, as if to say, “I love you Ya-Ya.” Apparently the family’s manipulation skills are hard-coded in her DNA!

We are all having a good time on the beach. The first day we went down to the ocean, Zoe ran straight for the water without hesitation. She was having just a great time. Then, on day two, Momma decided to put her on a boogie board and let her catch a small wave. Wrong! The small wave caught her and tossed her under the salty brine filling her tiny mouth and lungs with bad ocean memories. It took us 5 days just to get her to go back in the water. Momma felt so bad, thinking she had ruined all hope of her every enjoying the ocean or event just drinking water again.

We took her to Sea World yesterday and she had a ball! She watched all the shows, all the way through. Each show was about 20 minutes long and every one kept her interest. We were amazed, especially considering that she never got a nap and was in a great mood the whole time.

Momma got to do the “Interact with the dolphins” with Ya-Ya and looked like a little girl again, smiling from ear to ear, as she stroked the dolphins head like a new found puppy. Afterwards, she told me it was the most fun shes had her entire life. Judging from the smile she had in her face, she wasn’t joking. Zoe had a tough time watching her have so much fun and not being able to be with her, but a quick handful of fish crackers wooed her into a pleasant state of gluttony, forgetting her woes, if only for a short while. When Momma came out dressed and ready to leave, it was as if Zoe hadn’t seen her in a week!

Zoe conked out as we headed for the car to leave with dreams of dancing sea mammals in her head, and a plushy Shamu in her lap…

Categories: Milestones
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